Dating Post-Divorce: Getting Ready

Dating might be the furthest thing from your mind after a divorce. However, well-meaning friends and family might start asking you if you’ve thought about it. This can make you start to question if you should be trying to start dating post-divorce. However, it really comes down to some self-reflection and perspective….

Dating Post-Divorce: Getting Ready

Determine your feelings 

Societal pressure can make you feel like you should try dating post-divorce quickly. Friends and family asking you about it can make you think you’re doing something wrong by not trying to date. However, it all depends on how you truly feel about it. 

Don’t rely on the calendar to tell you when you should try dating again. Everyone is different, and will need a different amount of time to feel comfortable with dating again. Give yourself some time to grieve and wait until you feel comfortable with dating.

Move on from your ex

Do you find yourself still thinking about your ex or what they’re doing? Especially in the relationship department? If so, you might want to hold off on dating post-divorce until you can fully move on. 

Those lingering thoughts about your ex can make their way into new relationships and negatively impact them. You might be trying to “prove” to your ex you’ve moved on to better things, even when inside that isn’t the case. It’s best to wait until your ex is no longer a focus so your new relationships won’t be influenced by them.

Accept who you are

Trying out dating post-divorce means you’ll also have to be happy with who you are as an individual. For that reason, consider taking some time for yourself in between your divorce and dating.  It’s always useful to explore your new life on your own terms for a bit. 

Take some time and learn to enjoy being single. Try new things, go out with friends, anything that you would like to. Being happy with yourself while single will translate to you being happy in a new relationship.

Dating post-divorce is something that you should try when it feels right. There is no exact answer for when it’s time because everyone is different. Take some time to self-reflect and you’ll know when you’re ready to try dating again.