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Survival Guide for Dating After Divorce

Dating after divorce can seem very scary and overwhelming. Whether you’ve been married a long time or are a newlywed you are still adjusting to an entirely different future than what you expected. Make sure that you are ready to start dating again, there’s no need to rush. Don’t complain about your ex on dates as that can be a bit of a buzzkill. Take it slow when you find somebody that you like. And finally, have fun and relax! Dating should be fun and enjoyable. Don’t stress too much about finding a new partner, just enjoy the experience.

Survival Guide for Dating After Divorce: Getting Back in the Game

Make Sure You’re Ready

Before you start dating after divorce, make sure that you’re completely ready to get back in the game. You need to take time to adjust to all the changes in your life. In addition, going through a divorce is incredibly stressful, so make sure that you’ve recovered from the emotional upheaval of it all. Before you even think about going on a date, make sure that you take time for some self-love first. Put yourself as a priority and you’ll be more confident and open to a new potential partner.

Don’t Complain About Your Ex

Dating after divorce has one hard and fast rule: don’t talk about the ex. At least not at first. It’s best to take time to figure out what went wrong in your relationship. Both on your ex’s end and things that you might have done. Reflect on what you want in a new partner and try not to make comparisons. When you start dating somebody and they ask about your divorce, try to discuss it in a rational way. Bad-mouthing your ex-spouse can make you sound petty, so showing that you’ve maturely handled the divorce is best.

Take it Slow

Next, when dating after divorce, take it slow. There’s no need to rush into your next serious relationship. Taking it slow will give you time to really examine the relationship as it grows. In this way, you can hopefully spot any red flags. You’ll have a chance to address them or end the relationship before things are too serious. If you have children, it’s especially important to take your time. Make sure that you only introduce them to people that you see a future with. Otherwise, you run the risk of them getting attached to your new date and then being hurt if things don’t work out.

Have Fun

Finally, and maybe most importantly, have fun when dating after divorce! You probably never expected to be back in the dating game. But now that you’re here, make the most of it. Enjoy the fun of getting to know new people. Figure out what you want out of a new partner and see if you can find a great match. While it can be scary, dating should still be enjoyable. Try to relax and not worry about where things are going. Take time to just enjoy the thrill of a new date.

Dating after divorce can seem so overwhelming. But it’s important to try and not rush into things or take them too seriously. You have plenty of time to find a new partner. Make sure that you’ve healed from your divorce before you even start thinking about dating again. And make sure that you’ve taken time to prioritize yourself for a little while. Try not to bad mouth your ex to your new dates as this can be a red flag. Take things slow with any new partners, especially if you have children. And finally, have fun and enjoy the experience. You have another chance to go on first dates and meet some amazing new people, try to find the silver lining, and enjoy it.

Dating After Divorce: First Steps

Dating is never easy, but dating after divorce can feel daunting. It presents its own set of challenges. Perhaps it’s been a long time since you were even looking for someone to date. Use these tips to make this overwhelming experience feel a little bit easier.

Dating After Divorce: Where to Start

Self-Reflect

Before you even start thinking about dating after divorce, do a good hard look at your past. Unfortunately, it can be tough to dig deep like this. However, taking this step can help you to make sure you are not making the same mistakes over and over again. What went wrong in your marriage? What qualities did you like about your ex? Also, what qualities did you dislike? Think about traits they had that brought out both the best and the worst in you. Make a list of what you want in a partner, and what traits you want to avoid. 

Drop the Anger

Sure, you may still be really hurt about what happened in the past. There’s no denying that. But if you want to start dating after divorce, you have to work towards forgiving your ex. Carrying around anger towards your ex is like carrying around a heavy weight. Also, you could bring that anger and stress into your new relationship. Don’t feel ashamed to talk to someone or get help if you need help through the healing process. Letting go of the extra weight to find a new found freedom that will have you feeling ready and open to letting someone else in. 

Complaining about your ex is not what your new date wants to hear, especially on the first few dates. Keep conversations to what is important to you, and listen to your new date. Remember, they want to know you and not your ex. 

Expand Your Options

Perhaps you think you have a type. Maybe your ‘type’ has characteristics that did not work in the first place. Don’t limit yourself to only wanting to date one type of person. You should try going out with some people who don’t fit the mold of who you usually look for. You could be looking past some real gems! 

That being said, go with your gut. If you’re dating after divorce, don’t waste your time with someone you have a bad feeling about. Certainly, if you see red flags, get out. Do not stick around with someone who does not feel right. 

Online Dating

If you don’t know where to start, give online dating a try. Maybe online dating was not a thing the last time you were looking to date? That’s okay, give it a try. It is becoming one of the top ways to meet people now. When you are looking to start dating after divorce, online dating can help you ease back into the dating game by allowing you to get comfortable with just talking to people in messages. A tip is to have someone or several people you trust help you build, or approve, your profile. That way you make sure you’re set up for success.

There are many online dating sites out there now. There are even ones for different interests, religious affiliations, and age ranges. Read reviews and breakdowns to know which of the dating websites may be the best fit for you. 

In short, getting back into dating after divorce may feel overwhelming. Just take one step at a time. These steps will help you make your first steps towards finding a new relationship!