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Category: marriage

Improving Communication in a Marriage

Communication in a marriage is the absolute most important thing for a happy and long-lasting relationship. Communication isn’t just about talking to each other, though. It’s also about learning how to connect in other ways. One of the best ways to improve communication is to become a better listener. It’s also important to take time to talk when there are no distractions. Often, miscommunication happens because of simple logistics, so having a central place for information can be very helpful. And finally, learning your specific love language and your partners can be very helpful. Hopefully, you can learn to improve your communication and make your marriage stronger.

Improving Communication in a Marriage: The Secret Sauce for Success

Become a Better Listener

One of the best ways of improving communication in a marriage is to get better at listening. Listening doesn’t just mean being quiet while your partner talks. It also means thinking about what they’re saying. And showing that you understand. Nod, maintain eye contact and ask thoughtful questions to show you care. In return, your partner will likely listen more closely when you talk as well.

Be Distraction Free Sometimes

Improving communication in a marriage means being distraction-free sometimes. Life is busy. Between our phones and busy jobs, it can be hard to find time to talk without distractions. However, it is very important in a marriage. Try to set aside time each day where you put away your phones. Perhaps, try at mealtimes. If you have young children, take some time after they go to bed to connect about your day.

Have One Central Place for Information

A lot of times, miscommunication happens simply because people aren’t on the same page. Simple logistics can cause issues in a marriage just as easily as major problems. Improving communication in a marriage might just mean having one place to go for important information. For example, try a calendar app that your whole family can share. Having a central location for important information can help you stay on the same page with family events.

Learn Your Love Languages

Finally, one of the best ways of improving communication in a marriage is to learn each of your love languages. Each person has specific ways that they communicate with those they love. These can be through acts of service, words of affirmation, quality time, physical touch, and gift-giving. Learning which love language your partner speaks can help you connect more easily.

Improving communication in a marriage is one of the easiest ways to make it stronger. Communication is the basis of any relationship and is so important. Learning to listen better is a great way to start. Show your partner that you are interested in what they have to say. It’s also important to have some time to talk when you can focus without distractions. So put away your phones for a few minutes each day. This can let you truly connect. It can also help to have one place to go to for important family information. For example, a shared calendar app. And finally, learn your partner’s love language. By communicating with them in their love language, you can show how much you care. Hopefully, you can learn to communicate better and make your marriage even stronger.

How to Talk About Money with Your Spouse

It can be awkward to talk about money with your spouse, especially if you’ve been raised to never discuss finances with anybody. However, it’s a very important part of your lives together. Both you and your partner need to have a clear picture of your financial health. Start the conversation early in your marriage or even before you tie the knot. Be honest about debt and spending habits. Work together to figure out a financial goal. This could be a plan to get out of debt, a saving plan, or a retirement plan. And finally, keep the conversation going constantly throughout your lives. You should always be on the same page with finances with your spouse. Talking about money is a healthy part of any marriage that will make your relationship stronger.

How to Talk About Money with Your Spouse: Starting and Continuing the Conversation

Start Early

It’s important to talk about money with your spouse early on. It’s a great idea to discuss finances before you even get married. You should each have some idea of what kind of debt and income the other has so that you can plan accordingly. Once you start living together it’s important to be on the same page with spending and living habits.

Be Honest About Debt

Another important aspect of learning to talk about money with your spouse is to always be honest. It can be embarrassing to admit it if you have debt. However, your spouse needs to know the full picture. Be upfront about your spending habits. If you feel that you have problems with overspending, work together to come up with a solution. Hiding debt doesn’t make it go away.

Work Together

When you talk about money with your partner, you can work together to come up with financial goals. If you can, meet with a financial advisor who can help you create some realistic goals for your money. Come up with a plan to get out of debt, save for your future, save for emergencies, and a retirement plan. Don’t forget to save for things like vacations and home improvements, too.

Continue the Conversation

Finally, once you start to talk about money with your spouse, continue the conversation. You should both be checking in with each other about your financial health frequently. Both partners should have a clear idea of how on track you are with your goals. You don’t want to be surprised by unexpected financial problems. Keeping the lines of communication open will keep you both more on track with your spending habits.

You and your spouse need to talk about money throughout your marriage. After all, our lives depend on money entirely and you now have joint assets. You don’t want any financial issues to take you by surprise. Both of you should have a clear picture of your financial health throughout your marriage. Even if money is tight, this will allow you both to work together to start making things better. Start the conversation early and keep it going throughout your marriage. Be upfront and honest about spending habits and debt. And finally, work together to create some financial goals for your lives together. Whether you have plenty of money or are barely scraping by, tackling financial issues together will make your marriage stronger.

Make Valentine’s Day Memorable This Year

Valentine’s Day is a great time for a couple to reconnect and be reminded of how much they mean to each other. You and your partner might have been handling school closures with your children, travel stress from a pandemic, and both working from home together. It’s been a stressful time, so many couples need a little refresher on heating the romance. Start planning early for your Valentine’s Day surprise. Especially since restaurants are understaffed and have reduced hours. You might think of a special way to recreate an old memory or relive a fun time. Do something unexpected for your special someone that they’ll remember forever. And finally, be sincere and show them how much they mean to you. Keep that spark of romance going and remember why you love them so much in the first place.

Make Valentine’s Day Memorable This Year: How to Make the Holiday Extra Special for Your Sweetie

Plan Early

Remember to start planning Valentine’s Day early this year. There are plenty of restaurants that are facing shortages with staffing. In addition, many have reduced hours as well. Reservations are likely to fill up quickly and way in advance for fancier options. If you and your love are not comfortable going to a restaurant, consider ordering in from someplace special, or cooking dinner for them yourself.

Recreate an Old Memory

Another fun way to spark some romance this Valentine’s Day is to recreate an old memory. Pick a time early in your relationship that holds a lot of meaning for you. Take them back to that same spot and try to recreate an early date. Your partner will be touched by how thoughtful you are.

Do Something Unexpected

You can also keep the magic alive this Valentine’s Day by doing something unexpected. Try taking a cooking class and preparing them a new meal. Or you could take them dancing, to a drive-in movie, or on a romantic hike. You could also plan a short trip as a romantic get-away. Rather than the usual dinner or a movie, think of an off-the-wall date that is sure to be fun and memorable.

Make It Sincere

Finally, you don’t have to make it fancy to have a great Valentine’s Day. You just have to be sincere. You could organize a picnic in a pretty place, or even send them on a scavenger hunt with romantic clues. And it’s always a sweet thing to hand-write a note to your love about why you care about them as much as you do. If you get them a gift, try to find something that is unique, rather than a generic box of chocolates.

Making Valentine’s Day memorable is all about creativity and planning. Try to brainstorm about what it is about your partner that makes you love them so much. Then make sure that you convey that message to them on Valentine’s Day. It doesn’t have to be fancy or expensive, it just needs to be heartfelt. If you plan to take them out to eat at a nicer restaurant, plan to reserve your table soon as things will likely get booked far out this year. You could try recreating an old memory or doing something totally out of character. Surprise them with a unique date that they might never have thought of. And finally, don’t forget to be sincere and show them exactly how much you care. Hopefully, you and your love can have a magical Valentine’s Day that you’ll both remember forever.

Why Do People Cheat?

The age-old question “why do people cheat?” is one that spurned partners everywhere have asked themselves. The answer is often complex and involves a variety of different factors. However, there are a few reasons that come up more frequently than others as a response to why somebody might cheat. One of the most common reasons is boredom and simply falling out of love. Another reason that might cause a partner to cheat is that they are looking to boost their self-confidence. Sometimes cheating isn’t planned and happens with the help of outside factors. And finally, sometimes people cheat because they are feeling neglected by their partners. Whatever the reasons are, cheating can cause a lot of pain in a relationship and can end up costing you your marriage.

Why Do People Cheat? Getting to the Bottom of Infidelity

Boredom

One of the most common reasons why people cheat is because they simply fall out of love with their partners. Marriage can last a lifetime. It takes work and commitment to keep things interesting and to make a marriage last. Sometimes people cheat because the relationship is boring or because they feel like their partner just isn’t making an effort any longer.

To Boost Self-Confidence

Another reason that people cheat is to boost their self-confidence. Knowing that another person besides their partner also finds them attractive might be enough of an ego boost to make some partners pursue an affair. After being in a marriage for a long time, some people just want to prove to themselves that they’re still sexy to other people besides their spouse.

Outside Factors

Sometimes, outside factors are an excuse for why people cheat. For example, things like drinking, being away from their partner for a long time or having another person hit on them. However, cheating is still a decision that a person has to make themselves. So while these things could be an influence, they certainly aren’t the only cause.

Neglect

Finally, sometimes people cheat because they are feeling neglected in their relationship. This goes hand in hand with people wanting to boost their self-confidence. If a partner doesn’t feel like they are getting any effort from their spouse, they might be more likely to cheat. This is more common with women than with men.

While there is never a good reason for infidelity, unfortunately, some people still cheat. It can cause serious damage to a marriage. It can hurt your partner’s mental health, create a lack of trust, or end the relationship altogether. So people are often left wondering why people cheat. Often there are many reasons, but one of the most common is simply boredom. People just fall out of love with their partners. Some people feel neglected in their relationships and they cheat because it will make them feel better or boost their self-confidence. And finally, sometimes outside factors like drinking can play a role. Whatever the reasons, cheating can cause a lot of pain. If you have been cheated on, it’s important to get the support you need to decide how you want to handle it.

Signs of Dementia in Aging Parents

It can be difficult to distinguish signs of dementia in aging parents from other illnesses like Alzheimer’s or just simple aging. However, dementia can affect all aspects of their lives and make their day-to-day living much harder. So it’s important to try to figure out what’s truly going on if you are noticing some concerning things. You might be seeing communication problems. You might also just notice day-to-day problems like lost keys or things like that. Some dementia problems can change a person’s personality or even cause physical changes. If you are noticing these things, it’s important to get them the care they need. But it’s also important to talk to them about their wishes for their end-of-life care, as well as getting their affairs in order. It’s important to have these difficult conversations while they are still able to communicate effectively.

Signs of Dementia in Aging Parents: What to Look for and What to Do

Communication Problems

Some of the early signs of dementia in aging parents are problems with communication. And this can show up in several different ways. You might notice that they have a hard time finding words when they talk. They might also confuse times and places. They might forget people’s names as well, even close family members or friends. And finally, you might notice that they seem to struggle with understanding things.

Day to Day Problems

Some of the other signs of dementia in aging parents show up in their day-to-day lives. They might just be seeming to have a harder time navigating the world than they used to. It might be as simple as forgetting their keys often, or forgetting where they parked. But it could also be larger issues like not remembering how to read, how to find their way home, or showing poor judgment.

Personality Changes

Finally, you might notice some personality changes as part of the signs of dementia in aging parents. They might have mood swings or even a total change in their personality. Sometimes they develop a lot of fear around typical day-to-day things. For example, if they often get lost, simply leaving the home can be stressful. And finally, they might have some trouble walking and begin to be more unsteady on their feet.

What to Do

If you notice any of these signs of dementia in aging parents, it’s time to take some action. You need to take them to a medical professional. It’s also important to begin discussions about where they will live and when to give up driving. And finally, you might want to begin discussions of their will and estate. It’s important to have these conversations before things progress too much because they need to be of sound mind. Getting their legal affairs in order, as well as learning how they want their end of care life to look can ease your stress. At least you will know how they want to be taken care of and can focus on giving them support and comfort.

There are a lot of different signs of dementia in aging parents that you need to be on the lookout for. Dementia, Alzheimer’s, and aging can all look very similar. Therefore, it’s helpful to keep a log of any odd behaviors and to follow up with a doctor. You might notice issues with their communication and ability to remember things. You might also notice problems with their day-to-day life, like getting lost. And finally, you might notice that they have personality changes or even physical symptoms. If you are seeing these signs, it’s time to start having some tough but important legal conversations about how they want to be taken care of as their health declines. You also need to know how they’d like to set up their estate. Getting these discussions out of the way can give you the freedom to simply focus on their care.

Last Ditch Efforts Before Filing for Divorce

If your relationship is on the rocks, there are some last-ditch efforts before filing for divorce that you can try to save your marriage. You don’t want to file for a divorce and then, later on, wonder if you did everything possible to save your marriage. Start by talking it out with your partner. Try marriage counseling as a couple and work on your relationship. You can also try a short break away from each other. For example, just take a week apart to sort out your feelings. And finally, try to work on yourself. Divorce doesn’t happen in a vacuum. Maybe there are things that you can try to work through that would make you both happier. Hopefully, you’ll be able to find a way to save your marriage and become a stronger couple afterward.

Last Ditch Efforts Before Filing for Divorce: Save Your Marriage

Talk it Out

One thing to do before filing for divorce is to talk it out with your partner. Set aside a time just for this conversation. Pick a time when neither of you is stressed or angry with the other. Schedule it in advance and choose a place where you are comfortable that is not your own house. Discuss the seriousness of your relationship issues and decide if you both are willing to put in the effort to save your marriage.

Go to Counseling

Another thing that many couples try before filing for divorce is marriage counseling. Often, one of the main issues in a marriage is communication. A therapist is a great resource to help you develop better ways to communicate with one another. They can also help you with big life changes and give you ways to handle disputes more healthily.

Take a Short Break

One last-ditch effort to save your marriage before filing for divorce is to take a short break. This is not a formal separation. Therefore, set a time limit of a week or so. Take the time to sort out your feelings and get some space. Sometimes, having a little time to reflect alone can give you the perspective you need to see both sides of an issue.

Work on Yourself

Finally, it’s always a good idea to work on yourself but especially before filing for divorce. Speak with a therapist to help you sort out some of the emotions you are feeling. Try to let go of the victim mentality and see if you can get some perspective on your partner’s side of your issues. Sometimes when we are unhappy, it can show up as relationship issues. We blame our partners for the negative emotions we feel towards ourselves. A therapist can help you sort through these feelings.

If you are trying to save your marriage, there are some steps you can take before filing for divorce. It’s important to try everything you can so that you don’t have regrets later in life. Divorce is a serious step to take and an intense process. You want to make sure that you are ready for it before you file. Make sure that you and your partner have taken the time to have a real and serious conversation about your future. Set time aside in your schedule and plan the discussion so that you don’t say things in the heat of an argument. Try marriage counseling together or speaking to a therapist on your own. And you can take a short break to get some perspective as well. Hopefully, some of these suggestions will help you save your marriage and will allow you to grow as a couple.

Reasons Why Abuse Can Increase During the Holidays

Unfortunately, while the holidays are meant to be a magical time of year, abuse can increase during the holidays. There are many specific reasons for this, but the overarching reason is simply stress. The holidays are a time when everybody is a little more stressed than usual. And in volatile relationships, this can, unfortunately, lead to an increase in abuse. Abuse can be physical but it can also be financial, sexual, or emotional. The increase in alcohol during the holidays can also be a contributing factor. In addition, people are often under more pressure financially. And finally, family dynamics can add another layer of stress to any situation. If you are experiencing abuse in your relationship, reach out for support and get the help you need to get away safely.

Reasons Why Abuse Can Increase During the Holidays: The Stress of the Season

Stress

Stress is the main reason why abuse can increase during the holidays. The holidays are more stressful because there is increased pressure to partake in all sorts of holiday activities. You have the added work of finding presents for family members. In addition, kids are often home from school and over-excited. All of these things can increase stress levels. Often, when abusers are stressed, they are more likely to lash out. They can reach a breaking point and be unable to control themselves.

More Alcohol

Another reason why abuse can increase during the holidays is that there is more alcohol. Alcohol is a big part of why some people hurt their partners. During the holidays, there are a lot of parties and events where drinking is common. This can lead to more abuse if the drinker is a mean drunk. Or if they simply have lower restraint.

Financial Stress

Financial stress is another big part of why abuse can increase during the holidays. Money is one of the biggest stressors in a relationship. It can cause many fights as well. And these can, unfortunately, get out of hand quickly. Not to mention the issues that many people are facing this year because of the pandemic. There are a lot of people who are no longer working or taking large cutbacks on hours at work. This can increase financial stress to a very high degree.

Family Stress

Finally, family stress can also be a reason why abuse can increase during the holidays. If your partner doesn’t get along well with their family, you might not see them very often. However, you might have to during the holidays. Family can easily open up old wounds, bring back negative memories, and bring out the worst in people. Because of this, some partners lose their control and end up hurting their spouses.

Abuse can increase during the holidays for many reasons. However, they mostly boil down to stress. Anytime an abuser is at an increase in stress, there is an increase in the risk of abuse. They already likely have a personality where they feel out of control of their actions sometimes. Adding the stress of the holidays to this can make them snap even more quickly. In addition, there is often more drinking and alcohol involved around the holidays because of various events. And financial stress can also increase with the pressure of buying gifts. And finally, any situation can be made much more stressful if you add in family drama as well. If you are experiencing any sort of relationship abuse, reach out and get the help you need. There are many resources available, but you can also reach out to a friend to help you stay safe this holiday season.

Four Relationship Red Flags to Watch Out For

There are many relationship red flags to look out for when you start dating somebody. However, there are a few that are classic signs of emotional abuse. One of these is a lack of trust. If your partner needs to keep tabs on you all the time it can also be a warning sign. Another red flag is if they don’t have any other interests besides the relationship. And finally, if they are trying to put pressure on you to move faster than you feel comfortable, it’s a warning sign. If you notice any of these behaviors in your relationship, it might be time to examine them to see if it’s healthy.

Four Relationship Red Flags to Watch Out For (And Run From)

Lack of Trust

One of the main relationship red flags to look out for is a lack of trust. If your partner is always needing the details of where you’re going and who you are with, it shows a deep lack of trust. This is often a sign that they are insecure in the relationship. If they accuse you of cheating or being unfaithful when there is no reason, it also shows a lack of trust.

Controlling

One of the relationship red flags that are a clear indicator of emotional abuse is if your partner is controlling. This can present in many ways. Some partners want to keep tabs on where you go anytime you leave the house. Some go as far as installing trackers or going through your phone. Others use finances as a way to control and abuse their partners. If your partner is overly-controlling, it’s best to walk away before things escalate.

Lack of Interests

Another of the relationship red flags to be on the lookout for is if your partner doesn’t have interests outside of the relationship. For example, if they want to spend all of their time with you. Or if they don’t have a group of friends to hang out with outside of your relationship. While it’s fine to want to spend a lot of time with your partner it’s still important to maintain friendships and interests outside of the relationship.

Pressuring You

Finally, one final example of relationship red flags to look out for is if your partner is pressuring you. No caring partner should pressure you to move faster than you feel comfortable. If they are trying to put pressure on you to get intimate too quickly, have a frank conversation with them. Both partners must respect each others’ boundaries.

There are many relationship red flags to look for, but it’s especially important to look out for ones that can indicate early signs of emotional abuse. For example, if they don’t trust you and if you’ve never given them a reason to be mistrustful, it’s a warning sign. Similarly, if they keep tabs on you or try to control you, it can quickly get out of hand. In a healthy relationship, both partners should have interests and friendships outside of their dating lives. And finally, a loving and respectful partner will not pressure you to move faster than you feel comfortable. If you notice any of these red flags, it’s important to examine your relationship. Make sure that you are committing to somebody that respects you!

Outsider Clues to Abuse in a Relationship

Outsider clues to abuse in a relationship can be very helpful if you suspect somebody you know is a victim of domestic abuse. Often people in this situation are embarrassed or ashamed and don’t want to come forward. Or they might be worried about what effect it will have on their partner. If you are concerned about a friend, look for sudden behavior changes. Sometimes this also shows up in clothing style changes as well. If you feel uncomfortable around their partner, it’s probably your gut telling you something is wrong. And finally, if they start drinking or using drugs, it’s a warning sign that they are hurting. Hopefully, you can help them get the help they need.

Outsider Clues to Abuse in a Relationship: Is Somebody You Know in Need of Help?

Behavior Changes

One of the outside clues to abuse that might have led you to even start researching this is sudden behavior changes. If your previously-happy friend is suddenly acting depressed, it might be a sign that something is wrong in their relationship. If this is true, they might get overly defensive. Or they might have trouble finding their words or seem reluctant to talk about their dating life. Another clue is if they seem to have little time for you, are acting rushed, or cancel frequently. This might be a sign that their partner is overly controlling.

Style Changes

Another of the outsider clues to abuse in a relationship is a sudden style change. Of course, plenty of people change their clothing style often. However, if your friend is suddenly wearing clothes that seem very out of character, it might be a warning sign. Often overly controlling partners want their victims to dress very conservatively so that they’re covered up. And of course, if they are being physically abused, they might wear clothing to cover up injuries.

If You Are Uncomfortable Around Their Partner

If you feel uncomfortable around your friend’s new partner, it might be your gut telling you something. Trust your instincts if things feel off. Some outsider clues to abuse might be if your friend looks to their partner before answering or talking. Or if they seem to be uncomfortable around them or “pretending” too hard that all is well. You might also notice if their behaviors and mannerisms change when they’re in the presence of their partner.

Drinking or Substance Abuse

Finally, one of the outsider clues to abuse to watch for is if your friend starts abusing alcohol or drugs. If you can’t find any source of their unhappiness, but they’re suddenly drinking more heavily, it’s probably a clue that something is wrong. Often it is an issue with the relationship. Let them know that you will be there to support them if they’d like your help in quitting.

If you suspect that a friend might be in an abusive relationship, outsider clues to abuse can help you figure it out. If your friend changes their behavior all of a sudden or starts dressing differently, it might be a warning sign. Another red flag is if you get a bad feeling about your partner or notice that they act strangely around them. And finally, if they suddenly start drinking or using drugs. If you notice any of these signs in your friend, it might be worth it to set aside time to talk to them privately about their relationship. Know that victims sometimes are too afraid to come forward, so they may not tell you everything that’s going on. But it’s helpful to reassure them all the same that you can help. Hopefully, they’ll remember your offer and be brave enough to accept your help later.

Different Types of Separation Options

If you have been thinking about splitting with your spouse, you might be confused about the various types of separation options. There are trial separations, permanent, legal separations, and divorce. Each of them is slightly different though. Trial separations are intended to be short term while permanent separations are exactly what they sound like, permanent. Legal separation means that you permanently split up but cannot remarry. You also retain the right of marriage. And a full legal divorce means that your marriage is officially ended. Each state has different laws about types of separation. Therefore, it’s best to hire a knowledgeable attorney to help you through any type of separation.

Different types of Separation Options: Trial, Permanent, Legal, and Divorce

Trial Separation

One of the types of separation that a couple typically tries first is a trial separation. This is often done when a couple feels that they need a break from one another. In the period when you are living apart, you should think about whether or not you want to stay together or move towards a more long-term split. Before you start a trial separation, you and your spouse need to talk about how to handle childcare and money. You’ll also need to decide where you each will be living.

Permanent Separation

Permanent separation is another of the types of separation available. This means that a couple is living apart and never intend to get back together. However, you would still have all the rights of marriage and stay legally married. If you end up getting a divorce later, the date of your permanent separation can become an important factor. So make a note of when you and your spouse decide to separate permanently. Sometimes this affects your assets and joint property.

Legal Separation

Of the different types of separation, it’s hard to know the difference between a legal separation and a divorce. However, a legal separation is not an option in all states. But where it is, it means that you are legally separating but still keeping your marriage rights. Couples might choose to do this if they have religious issues with divorce. In addition, if a spouse wants to stay on another’s insurance, they may opt for a legal separation. And some choose this for the sake of their children. Legal separation usually has the same court process of splitting assets and child support as a divorce would. If you have a legal separation you cannot remarry.

Divorce

A full legal divorce is the most final of the different types of separation. It means that your marriage is permanently ending. This means that you will split assets and property. If you have children, you’ll need to agree on custody. You’ll also have to decide on child support. A divorce is a long a drawn-out process, however after your divorce ends, you are free to remarry.

The different types of separation can be confusing as they are all similar. A trial separation is short-term and couples can use it to decide if they want to break up or stay together. A permanent separation means that they have decided to live apart but will stay legally married. A legal separation is less common but means that a couple will divide up assets but still stay married. And finally, a divorce means that your marriage has officially ended. You and your partner will have to decide which type of separation makes the most sense for you. Whichever you choose, you’ll want a great attorney by your side to represent you.