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Author: Robert Reeves

Shared Custody Holiday Schedule

If you are trying to figure out a shared custody holiday schedule with your ex, it can be an emotional and confrontational process sometimes. Everybody has special traditions that they want to celebrate with their children when it comes to holidays. But when you are sharing custody, there will inevitably be some times when you have to be separated from your kids even though you don’t want to.

There are plenty of options you can take for fairly dividing holidays. Some parents choose to split the day up and have a custody switch during the day. Others divvy up holidays throughout the year based on each parent’s preferences. Others choose to switch off from year to year with their kids. However, even if you aren’t able to celebrate on the day with your kids, you can still have your own celebration with them, even if it’s a few days late. Your children won’t care what day it is, they’ll just be happy to be with you and creating special memories together.

Shared Custody Holiday Schedule: Figuring Out Logistics

Split the Day

One example of a shared custody holiday schedule involves splitting the actual day of important holidays. For example, you could celebrate a Thanksgiving lunch with your children and then drop them off at their other parent’s house for Thanksgiving dinner. Talk about a lot of turkey! This allows both parents to have some time with their kids on the holiday itself. The only drawback is that it can feel like a lot of shuffling around for children, and can be a little overwhelming for little ones.

Divvy Up Holidays

Another potential shared custody holiday schedule involves divvying up holidays throughout the year. This works well if parents each have separate holidays that they are particularly fond of. For example, if one parent is Jewish and the other Christian, it’s easier to work out who will have the children throughout December. If one parent really loves to celebrate Halloween and the other really loves Thanksgiving, you can divvy up those holidays fairly between you. This idea really only works when coparents are able to really compromise together and figure out a system that feels fair to everybody.

Switch Off Years

Others parents choose to celebrate holidays every other year with their children. For example, the children go with one parent this Christmas, and then next year, they switch to the other parent. You can still divvy up the holidays throughout the year so that each parent gets a few that are special to them. But every other year, there will be some sadness if it’s not your year with your children.

Celebrate Separately 

Finally, even if you are dealing with some arguments or don’t really get your way when it comes to your shared custody holiday schedule, you can still make precious memories with your children. Your kids don’t really care what day an actual holiday falls on. So if it’s important to you to celebrate with them, just hold your own celebration when you get them back. Most likely, your kids will be more than happy to celebrate two holidays. Just make sure to remember that the important thing is that you create memories and traditions together, no matter if it’s the actual calendar day of a holiday or not.

Figuring out a shared custody holiday schedule can be a real headache for new coparents. Any sort of custody situation is bound to have some heated moments, but holidays are one that parents get particularly emotional about. And it makes sense because holidays are such an important part of our memories from childhood. You can opt to split up the day itself so that each parent has some time with their children on the actual holiday. However, this can be tiring for younger children, and it can make holidays seem rushed and frantic. You can also divvy up holidays that are of particular importance to each of you throughout the year if you’re able to compromise on things. You can also switch off every other year for holidays too.

It can be hard to be apart from your children, but it doesn’t mean that you can’t still celebrate with them when you have custody again. Even if you aren’t celebrating with your children on the actual day of the holiday, they won’t remember that in the future. All they’ll remember is how much fun you had together.

Tips for Your Adoption Home Study

If you’re planning to adopt, an important part of the process will be your adoption home study. This is when a social worker visits your home and makes sure that’s it’s a safe environment for a child. While a lot of people stress about this process, it’s really just a matter of making sure that your child has a nurturing environment in which to grow up. Do your research so you know what to expect and what’s required in your state. Clean, but don’t go too crazy with things. Try to baby proof your home and prepare a room for your future child. And finally, relax a little bit. Try to remember that your case worker wants this to be successful for you too. Hopefully, your visit will go great and you’ll be one step closer to growing your family.

Tips for Your Adoption Home Study: Don’t Stress Too Much

Research

Before your adoption home study, it can help to do some research. Each state has certain requirements for homes. For example, there might be requirements about the room size for your future child, and they might need things like windows in the room. Know what your agent will be looking for up front so you can make sure that your home meets the standards.

Clean, But Don’t Go Crazy

It’s helpful to clean ahead of your adoption home study. However, it’s not necessary to go totally crazy with the cleaning. You just want to present a pleasant and welcoming environment. Try to clean as if you were having company over, because after all, that’s what this visit is. A chance for your case worker to get to know you a little better.

Baby Proof

Another great thing to do ahead of your adoption home study is baby proofing. You can cover up electrical outlets if you’re expecting to welcome a baby or toddler. For any child, make sure that if you have a pool that it’s properly fenced off. If you have pets that can be aggressive, begin thinking of alternative plans for where they might live. Make sure all windows are operable, and remove any hazards from the home.

Relax

Finally, relax. Try to remember that your adoption home study is just a chance for your case worker to get to know a little bit more about your family and your home. They are on your side and want every child to go to a loving home. They aren’t looking for reasons to ding you out of the program. Be polite and open with them. Try to remember that they just want what’s best for every child.

Your adoption home study is an exciting step in the adoption process. But it’s one that a lot of parents can get a little bit stressed about. Try to relax and remember that this isn’t a chance for somebody to criticize every aspect of your home. Rather, it’s a chance for them to let you know if there are any things that you need to address before a child arrives. Do a little research on what is necessary in your area, and make changes accordingly. Clean up the home so that’s it’s tidy and welcoming. Try to go ahead and prepare a room for your future child, and plan to baby proof if they are young. Finally, relax. As long as you plan to welcome your future child into a safe and nurturing environment, your home study will go just fine!

How to Dress Appropriately for Court

Making sure to dress appropriately for court can help you make the best first impression possible in front of a judge. If you are going to court for a divorce proceeding, you want to ensure that you are looking and behaving appropriately and in a way that shows respect to the judge. This means opting for conservative clothing and hairstyles for both men and women. Additionally, it’s important to follow the rules of the court room and always be respectful of the judges and attorneys. For example, never interrupt, address the judge appropriately, and avoid distracting behavior. Hopefully, by dressing the part, you can have a more favorable outcome for your court decision.

How to Dress Appropriately for Court: Making the Best Impression

Clothing

If you’re wanting to dress appropriately for court, keep in mind that conservative and professional is usually best. You want to make sure that you are wearing clothing that is clean and wrinkle-free. Avoid tight fitting outfits, revealing shirts, or anything too casual. For example, for men, slacks and a button down shirt is appropriate with closed toe shoes. For women, slacks and a shirt, or a professional dress is appropriate. Avoid flip-flips and t-shirts. While it’s fine to have your own sense of style outside court, when you’re in the courtroom, it’s best to forgone fashion in favor of a more traditional outfit.

Hair

In order to dress appropriately for court, you’ll also need to make sure that your hair and accessories are professional. For example, a low bun, pony tail, or styled hair for women, and a clean and neat hairstyle for men. Avoid outlandish facial hair styles, dyed hair, or lots of piercings. Cover up tattoos when able to, and try to ensure that you are clean and put-together at all times. 

Behavior

Besides needing to dress appropriately for court, you’ll also need to behave in a way that is respectful to the rest of the court members and judge. For example, ask your attorney what the appropriate way to address the judge is. Additionally, avoid things like chewing gum, talking on the phone, or otherwise distracting behavior. Never interrupt your attorney or the judge when speaking, and answer questions directly. 

The Bottom Line

Showing up for court can be intimidating, and while it shouldn’t necessarily matter what you look like, showing an effort with your clothes and styling can go a long way in making a good first impression. Save your funky sense of style for another venue and instead opt for professional, conservative clothing while in court. Try to behave in a way that is respectful of the court and court members, and make sure to arrive on time and with everything you need in tow. If you have questions about how to behave or dress, ask your attorney for guidance.

The courtroom is a very prim and proper place, and calls for a respectful appearance and behavior. If you need to dress appropriately for court, you’ll need to keep in mind that this is not the place for outlandish, daring outfits. Your sense of style does not matter nearly as much as your behavior. So forgo the loud outfits, funky hair, or chunky jewelry and opt for outfits that are more traditional and conservative. In terms of behavior, always be respectful of the judge, attorneys, and other members of the court. Avoid distracting behaviors like chewing gum, talking on the phone, or interrupting. Pay attention when anybody is speaking, and make sure to address the judge in a respectful way. Hopefully, you and your attorney can go through what is expected of you beforehand so that you can arrive and put your best foot forward for your court appearance.

Divorce with a Special Needs Child

Divorce with a special needs child can be more complicated than a typical divorce settlement because your child might need a specialized plan when it comes to things like custody agreements, support payments, or splitting up assets. It’s important to know that legal custody and physical custody are very different things, and that your child’s plan of care might impact these things greatly.

You might also work out child support payments that last longer than the typical eighteen years depending on your child’s needs. It’s important to find extra support during this time in order to help your child with the transitions that they will be facing and with helping you navigate a very stressful time. Enlisting the help of an experienced divorce attorney will make the process much smoother and will increase your chances of getting the outcome that you want from the divorce settlement. Hopefully, you, your spouse, and child can also adapt to the changes coming and begin working on a smooth co-parenting transition.

Divorce with a Special Needs Child: Things to Consider

Legal Custody

When going through a divorce with a special needs child, or with any child, it’s important to know the difference between legal and physical custody. A parent with legal custody will be able to make all decisions for the child when it comes to things like medical needs, education, or legal questions. A parent with physical custody is the one with whom the child lives. Parents can share legal and physical custody, or can only share one or the other. It’s possible for a parent to share legal custody when it comes to decision-making, but the child lives full time with the other parent.

Physical Custody

When figuring out physical custody during a divorce with a special needs child, things can be more intricate than typical divorce proceedings. This is because your child might require specialized medical equipment in the home or car, specialized education, or need to be within a certain location to be near to medical appointments. Parents will have to consider what is in the best interest of the child, just as the judge will. Some of these decisions might depend on the parent’s budget for medical equipment, or the child’s specific care plan.

Support Payments

Support payments can also look a little different in a divorce with a special needs child. Typical child support payments end when the child turns eighteen and legally becomes an adult. However, a child with special needs might need to continue living at home or might continue to need financial assistance well into adulthood. Because of this, child support might last much longer than the typical eighteen years, depending on their needs. 

Finding Support

When going through divorce of any kind, the process is incredibly stressful and very difficult on both parents and children. It’s important to make sure that you have support in place to help you through this transitional time. Enlist the help of a qualified mental health counselor for yourself, and look into supplementing your child’s care plan with additional resources to help them with this transition. It’s also absolutely imperative that you hire an experienced and knowledgeable divorce attorney to help you navigate the divorce process to ensure that you get the settlement you and your child deserve. 

Divorce is difficult on everybody, but going through divorce with a special needs child can bring up even more intricacies and complications to an already confusing process. It’s important to enlist help from an experienced attorney as soon as you believe that the divorce is actually happening. When looking for an attorney, make sure to ask about their experience when it comes to legal cases similar to yours.

You might be facing more intricacies when it comes to legal and physical custody since your child has specialized needs. This might impact which parent’s house they live at, how often they can visit the other parent, or what kind of equipment will need to go with them through custody transitions. Child support payments might also last longer than the typical eighteen years if your child will have ongoing financial needs as an adult. It’s important to find emotional support for yourself and your child as you go through this tricky time. Enlist the help of a mental health professional, and consider adding some extra support to the list of care providers for your child as well. Hopefully, your whole family can move smoothly through this process and end up with the divorce settlement that will most benefit your child.

Dealing with Grief During a Divorce

Dealing with grief during a divorce can be a long process. Everybody experiences divorce differently. You likely will go through many stages with your grief, and they might each take different lengths of time. Don’t compare your journey to anybody else’s. Instead, try to work on healthily dealing with your emotions. Try to accept your divorce and permit yourself to feel your feelings. Surround yourself with supportive family and friends. Take plenty of time for self-care and make yourself a priority. And finally, be patient. This process can take a long time. But rest assured, someday you will feel at peace with your divorce. And then you’ll be able to move on to the next chapter of your life.

Dealing with Grief During a Divorce: Channeling Emotions in a Healthy Way

Try to Accept the Divorce

It’s important to accept reality when dealing with grief during a divorce. Often, the denial stage of grief can take a long time. But denying the reality won’t change the situation. Try to take some time to address the fact that your marriage is ending. Only after you accept that it’s over can you begin to move forward.

Surround Yourself with Supportive People

An important part of dealing with grief during a divorce is surrounding yourself with supportive family and friends. Try to reach out to people that understand what you’re going through and who will help you in productive ways. For example, helping you find new interests instead of just trash-talking your ex.

Take Time for Self-Care

Don’t forget to take some time for self-care when handling the grief during a divorce. Especially if you are feeling very stressed by the divorce process. Take a few moments to meditate, breathe deeply, or calm your mind. Try to find some new activities or hobbies that interest you. Another important part of self-care is getting the help you need if you are struggling. Don’t be afraid to reach out to a professional therapist if you feel like you are struggling.

Be Patient

Finally, when dealing with grief during a divorce, be patient. This process takes a long time. And it takes different amounts of time for everybody. Don’t compare yourself to other people you know who have gotten divorced. Their situation might have been very different from your own. Let it take as long as it needs to take. Just trust yourself and the fact that someday, you will be able to move forward.

Tackling grief during a divorce can be a long and difficult process. It’s important to first accept the reality of the situation so that you can begin to move forward. It’s hard to come to terms with the fact that your marriage is over, but denying it won’t change the situation. Surround yourself with supportive family and friends who will help you find new hobbies or even help you when you’re ready to start dating again. Take plenty of time for self-care, including mental self-care. And finally, give yourself some grace. Be patient and know that this process can take a while. However, someday you will be able to move forward knowing that you made the right decision. Hopefully, you’ll be able to move on to an exciting new part of your life and maybe even meet somebody new to share it with.

Types of Therapy for Depression and Anxiety

If you are seeking help for depression and anxiety, there are many different types of therapy available. Sometimes, it can take some trial and error to find the right therapist and type of therapy to suit your personality and needs. Be patient, and continue looking if the fit isn’t right.

You might consider cognitive behavioral therapy, which is the most common type of talk therapy. Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing therapy can help you address traumatic events from the past and learn to cope with them in a more healthy way. Art therapy can help you express yourself without using words, and can help you identify underlying feelings and emotions. And finally, animal therapy can allow you to cope with stress and feel the self-confidence that comes with taking care of another living creature. Hopefully, you can try different forms of therapy and find the right fit for you.

Types of Therapy for Depression and Anxiety That Can Be Helpful

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy

Cognitive behavioral therapy, or CBT, is the most common of the types of therapy. It involves mostly just talking with a mental health professional about your experiences and emotions. Through your interactions, they’ll help you identify stress triggers in your life and learn healthy coping strategies for them. The goal of CBT is to identify negative thoughts and mind-sets, and challenge them and correct them into more healthy and realistic views.

Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing Therapy 

Another of the types of therapy that is getting more and more common is eye movement desensitization and reprocessing therapy, or EMDR. This was originally used for veterans experiencing PTSD, but is now used to address traumatic events of any degree. The idea behind EMDR is that when your body is experiencing emotional trauma, your brain doesn’t process the memories correctly. Therefore, they can continue to haunt you and cause anxiety for many years. EMDR aims to reprocess these memories by engaging both sides of your brain while you discuss the traumatic event by having you follow a moving light or object with your eyes. 

Art Therapy

Art therapy can be a fun way to explore your more creative side. This type of therapy allows you to explore your subconscious emotions by examining your artwork. This might include painting, drawing, sculpture, or other forms of art. A trained professional can help you identify emotional undertones, symbolism, and nonverbal messages within your artwork. You can also practice things like journaling at home to help you identify patterns in your thinking or gain more perspective on a situation. 

Animal Therapy 

Finally, one last examples of different types of therapy is animal assisted therapy, or AAT. This can involve petting, holding, or caring for a support animal like a dog, cat, bunny, or horse. The animals are trained, and you typically are guided through this therapy with a counselor. Interacting with animals can reduce blood pressure, release feel-good endorphins, and take away stress. Additionally, caring for another living creature can help you gain self-confidence.

There are many different types of therapy available for a number of mental health issues. It’s important to look around until you find the therapist and therapy that works best for you. Don’t hesitate to reach out to another counselor if the fit just doesn’t feel right. You need to feel comfortable with the person you are working with, and have confidence that they’ll help you get to a better mental space. You might consider CBT, or talk therapy to help identify and work through negative perceptions. You might also consider EMDR if you are dealing with traumatic situations from the past.

Art therapy can be a creative way to express yourself non-verbally and can reveal things you might not actually realize about yourself. And finally, animal therapy can be a soothing way to rebuild self-confidence and tackle stress. Hopefully, you can try a few different types of therapy and professionals to find the best fit for your needs.

Handling Divorce Stress: Breathing Exercises

Breathing exercises can help you reduce your stress and practice mindfulness, especially if you are going through something stressful like a divorce. You can do these exercises whenever you have a few moments of free time to help you mentally focus. And you can use them if you’re feeling particularly anxious. The idea is to focus solely on just your breathing and let your mind clear for a few moments. There are tons of techniques you can use, but 4-7-8 breathing is one of the most popular. You can also try breathing through alternating nostrils, or lying down and trying diaphragmatic breathing. Finally, the lion’s breath technique is also a good one to try if you are feeling particularly frazzled. Hopefully, you can use these exercises to calm down your nervous system and give yourself some time to clear your head.

Handling Divorce Stress: Breathing Exercises to Calm You Down

4-7-8

4-7-8 breathing is one of the most popular and widely recommended breathing exercises for stress. To do this, sit comfortably and touch your tongue to the back of your upper teeth. Then exhale all of your air in a whooshing sound. Inhale while you count to four. Then hold your breath for 7 counts. Then, exhale slowly with a whooshing sound for 8 counts. You should keep your tongue in the same position for the duration of the exercise. Repeat 3 more times.

Nostril Switch

Another of the easy breathing exercises that you can practice whenever you have a free moment is the alternating nostril switch. To do this, cover your right nostril and breathe in through your left nostril. Then, cover your left nostril and breathe out through the right. Breathe back in through the right and cover it. Breathe out through the left nostril. Breathe back in through the left nostril and cover it. Repeat this pattern for about five minutes or until you feel calmer.

Diaphragmatic Breathing

Some breathing exercises can do more than just battle stress. Diaphragmatic breathing can help you with lung health and blood pressure in addition to calming your nervous system. Lay comfortable on your back with a pillow under your head and knees bent. Lay one hand on your upper chest and the other below your rib cage. Inhale through your nose and feel your stomach press against your hand. Then exhale through pursed lips as you tighten your abdominal muscles. Keep your upper hand perfectly still. Repeat for five minutes several times a day. 

Lions’ Breath

Finally, one last exercise you can try is the lion’s breath technique. It’s an energizing yoga practice that can help release tension in your body. Sit comfortably with your hands on your knees. Inhale deeply through your nose and then open your eyes wide. Open your mouth as widely as you can and stick your tongue out and down as if touching your tongue to your chin. Exhale strongly through your mouth making a deep “haaaa” sound from your belly. As you do this, look up as if looking at the space between your eyebrows. Repeat two or three times.

Deep breathing exercises can be hugely beneficial if you are dealing with divorce stress or anxiety from any situation. And not only that, but some of the techniques can also improve your pulmonary or cardiovascular health as well. It’s important to find the practices that work for you if you are experiencing stress. In addition to deep breathing, you might consider things like journaling, yoga, affirmation, meditation, or speaking with a therapist. You can do deep breathing when you have a few moments throughout your day or when you’re feeling particularly anxious or tense. The main focus is simply to clear your mind of stress and focus it solely on your breathing instead. At least for a little while. Even just a short break like this can help you body and mind to begin to relax a bit. Hopefully, you can find the techniques that work best for you so that you can fight divorce stress and improve your mental health.

Elderly Parent Getting Re-Married: What to Know

An elderly parent getting re-married can feel a bit jarring, but it’s not actually that uncommon. Because people are living longer and in better health, more and more older folks are deciding to take another chance on love even in their seventies and beyond. However, it’s important to have a conversation with them and make sure that you are on the same page about avoiding scams and protecting them financially. There are potential benefits to the union, and it’s something that you should really give them space and autonomy on deciding. However, there are definitely some things to discuss and things that you might need to make sure they’ve thought about before they head down the aisle. For many, getting married at an older age can be a second chance at happiness and can help them make sure that they have a companion to share their golden years with.

Elderly Parent Getting Re-Married: What to Know to Protect Them 

Why It’s More Common

An elderly parent getting re-married is becoming more common mostly because our quality and length of life is extending. Medicine is improving and the quality of care for the elderly can make their last years much more peaceful. Many retirees living in retirement communities are finding new partners because they are in a place with our people that might share their same interests and experiences. It’s also become less of a stigma to go through divorce, so there are more single elderly people than in previous generations that are feeling more confident in choosing a new partner, even later in life.

Avoiding Scams

While we’d like to think that an elderly parent getting re-married is as innocent as we think, the truth is that there are a lot of scammers out there that target older populations in particular. Therefore, if your parent is expressing interest in a new partner, it’s helpful to try to get to know the person and see what your impression is. If they are significantly younger, if they seem overly concerned about talking about merging finances, or if there are other red flags, it might be worth it to do a little digging into their background.

Potential Benefits

There are a lot of benefits to an elderly parent getting re-married though, and it’s something that you should try to give them autonomy over. After all, they are adults who can make their own decisions. But that’s not to say that your opinions should be totally ignored. However, writing this off or treating it as something less than serious can actually be missing the point that a marriage might really benefit them. For example, it can give them a new lease on life, it can help them prevent loneliness as they get older, and it can create a relationship that helps them be more accountable for their health. 

Things to Consider 

There are definitely some things to consider and items that you’ll want to discuss with your parent. For example, are they planning on merging their assets with their new partner? Or are they going to sign a pre-nuptial agreement? Merging their life with another person might affect things like their retirement benefits, healthcare, social security, or veterans benefits. Additionally, it means splitting their assets up between potential step children that they might not necessarily have as close a relationship with. Finally, it can also mean that you now are inviting new siblings into your family traditions, which can buck the dynamic a bit. While none of these should necessarily be deal-breakers, they are things that you and your parent should discuss.

An elderly parent getting married can actually be a great thing for their mental health and overall wellness. People with partners are generally happier, they have more energy, better social lives, and they have somebody that can help them keep track of health issues or notice new concerns. The trend is becoming more common as people live longer and longer, and as older folks are feeling more comfortable leaving unhappy marriages and striking out in new relationships, even at an advanced age. If you are getting some red flags about the situation, you should do a little digging and make sure that they are not being targeted as a victim of a scam.

However, try to keep an open mind if everything seems on the up and up. While it might come as a shock, it can actually be a really monumental decision for your parent, and one that you should take as seriously as they took your engagement. Finally, there are definitely things that you should try to get on the same page with them about, like end of life care, health concerns in the partner and how they plan to handle their care, estate planning concerns, or just the general dynamic of merging two new families. While it can be a lot to consider, it might mean that your parent spends their later years much happier with a companion that they can share their experiences with.

Maintaining Mutual Friendships After Divorce

Maintaining mutual friendships after divorce can be tricky to navigate, especially at first or while you’re in the process of ending your marriage. It’s normal for couples to face some awkwardness from their social circle after a breakup.

Maintaining mutual friendships after divorce can be tricky to navigate, especially at first or while you’re in the process of ending your marriage. It’s normal for couples to face some awkwardness from their social circle after a breakup. However, if you and your ex want to maintain all of your friendships, it’s important to discuss this as a goal and how you both plan to make it happen. For example, talk to your friends up front about your intentions to remain in the social group. Avoid trash talking one another so that you don’t force any more hostility. And finally, don’t isolate yourself or wait for invitations. Instead, be proactive. Hopefully, you can use these tips to better navigate this difficult time in your life.

Maintaining Mutual Friendships After Divorce: Focusing on the Bigger Picture

Make an Agreement

If you and your ex have a large friend group, it can be painful to think about that group splitting up. Forcing your friends to take sides in your divorce will make everybody uncomfortable and is more likely to isolate you both from your social circle. Instead, discuss with one another how important it is to maintain your friendships, and work on avoiding things like trash talking or arguing in public.

Discuss Openly

Furthermore, maintaining mutual friendships after divorce is easier if you speak directly with your social group. Let friends know that you don’t plan on forcing them to choose sides, and that as much as possible, you both can get along in public enough to get invited to the same events.

Don’t Trash Talk

One important thing to remember with maintaining mutual friendships after divorce is that you’ll have to save your venting for somebody else. If you are determined not to force your friends to choose sides, you’ll have to cut back any trash talking. Otherwise, it’s likely that you will make your friend uncomfortable. Plus, your ex is likely to find out which can make things even more contentious. 

Stay Social

While it might be difficult, it’s important to be proactive when maintaining mutual friendships after divorce. Your friends might not know exactly how to react. So instead of isolating yourself or waiting for them to invite you to events, be assertive. Invite everybody out for a meal, or ask if you can come along to any events so that they know you are comfortable being around your ex or at least being around people who are friendly with them. Isolating yourself can negatively impact your mental health and create resentment.

Maintaining mutual friendships after divorce can be easier said than done in some situations. However, if you and your ex are both committed to keeping your friend group intact, it’s definitely doable. But you’ll both have to discuss things ahead of time and work on getting comfortable with at least being at the same events together without causing drama.

Moreso, you might have to tell your friends up front about your intentions so that they don’t feel like they need to choose sides. Avoid trashing your ex because it can make your friends feel uncomfortable and can harm your relationship. And finally, avoid isolating yourself, and instead be proactive about being social. Hopefully, you and your ex will be able to navigate this tricky situation without too much difficulty and keep your social group intact.

Overcoming Resentment in a Marriage

Overcoming resentment in a marriage can be easier said than done. There are many reasons why emotions like this can build up between two partners. From the stress of managing a household together, to raising children, splitting up obligations, financial stress, or overcoming hurdles in the relationship, it’s not uncommon for one partner to feel as though they are putting in more effort. And when those feelings go unchecked, it can lead to deep feelings of resentment.

If you are feeling this way, it’s important to really examine what you want to get out of the marriage. Is it a relationship worth saving? Or would you be happier if you ended the marriage and moved forward with divorce? If you are determined to overcome your resentment and rebuild your relationship, it’s helpful to determine the root cause of your feelings. Then, you’ll need to talk about it with your spouse. Sometimes therapy can be very helpful in navigating tricky situations like this. Finally, you’l need to establish some boundaries to avoid letting resentment build up again in the future. Hopefully, you can work together to make your marriage stronger.

Overcoming Resentment in a Marriage: Moving Forward

What Future Do You Want?

Sometimes, the important question to ask yourself is whether or not the marriage is worth saving. Overcoming resentment is very possible, but it takes work on both sides of the partnership. It’s important to really give thought to what you want your future to look like, and whether your marriage will allow you to have that future. There are plenty of couples who find that they are no longer compatible, and decide to move forward with an amicable divorce.

Find the Root Cause

If you are determined to overcome the resentment and make your marriage stronger, it can be helpful to identify the root cause of your feelings. For many people, it’s a perceived imbalance when it comes to the relationship. For example, if you feel that you put more effort into your marriage than your partner. Or if you feel that you are doing more of the parenting, chores, household management, financial earning, or caregiving for aging parents. While it’s normal to have a give and take with your partner, in the end you should feel that you both contribute equally to your family’s happiness. Figuring out where the resentment is coming from can help you move forward with addressing it.

Talk About It

When overcoming resentment in a marriage, you’ll need to have an open and honest conversation with your spouse. It’s important to start the conversation when you both are relaxed, rather than when you’re already in a disagreement. Therapy can be a great place to bring up something like this. Marriage counseling can be hugely beneficial for helping you work through emotions like this, and making sure that both partners feel heard.

Prevention

Finally, when overcoming resentment in a marriage, it’s important to put boundaries in place so that you don’t experience these same feelings building again. It can be helpful to list out responsibilities that you have as a couple and split them up equally between you. It’s also helpful to establish a policy of open communication with one another. Pushing aside these kinds of emotions can just wind up making them even stronger. Instead, when you feel there is an imbalance, address it right away so that you can both work through it together.

Life is incredibly stressful for everybody. We all live busy lives and when you add in the complications of working a job, raising children, maintaining a household, or overcoming obstacles in your marriage, it can make things feel even more stressful. And when one partner feels like they are doing more of the emotional, physical, or financial labor of a marriage, it’s easy for feelings of resentment to begin to form.

Overcoming resentment in a marriage is not an easy task, but it’s important if you’re going to be able to move forward and be happy with your spouse. So think about the future you want and decide if your spouse is the person you want to share it with. If they are, you and them will need to do the work. Try to identify the root cause of your feelings, and start an open dialogue with your partner. Going to marriage counseling can be hugely beneficial when working through difficult relationship issues like this. Finally, put in place boundaries so that you can avoid these types of feelings from growing out of control in the future. Hopefully, you can both decide to work together to address any negative emotions..