Conflicting Personalities: Opposites Attract

While everyone knows the phrase “opposites attract”, it’s also possible that conflicting personalities can lead to a divorce. This friction can even lead to some divorce conflict. While some traits can work with each other, they might also come with some potential for conflict…

Conflicting Personalities: Common Types

Introvert/extrovert

One of the most well-known conflicting personalities are introverts and extroverts. Introverts don’t like to be out socializing all the time. Meanwhile, extroverts love to be out doing things with other people. In some cases, this can work as an extrovert encourages an introvert to be more social. 

However, it usually leads to fighting. Spouses will start to feel resentful if they need to go out of their comfort zone for the sake of their partner. Instead, it’s good for a couple to have a similar balance for being social and staying in.

Organized/Disorganized

Another example of conflicting personalities is those who are organized and those who are disorganized. Organized people like structure and to have a place for everything. Those who are disorganized tend to be a bit more impulsive and will place things wherever they feel like.

Again, these kind of couples can help each other. A person can be either too rigid or too irresponsible on their own. Being with someone who’s their opposite can help them fix this. Still, they can also end up arguing if neither wants to change.

Adventurous/traditional

One type of conflicting personalities couples don’t pay too much attention to is being adventurous versus being traditional. The former is someone who is always down to try new things, while the latter is someone who likes to stick with what they know. For younger couples, this dynamic can work quite well. The adventurous one can encourage the other to experience things they wouldn’t have otherwise.

Much of the conflict can stem over future plans. The idea of “settling down” somewhere may not appeal to an adventurous person. Rather, they want to keep doing fun things. Their partner may want to live a bit more of a quite life as they get older together. These disagreements can become constant fights as they get older.

How-to Heal From a Bad Relationship

Real life relationships are not like the ones in the movies. While sometimes they can feel close, they are not always blissful and perfect. Relationships require hard work, patience and love. Although most relationships have more positive moments than bad ones, some are really toxic. Where it’s a bad dating relationship or an unhealthy marriage, these are the kind of relationships that you do not need to stay in. Yet somehow, they can be the most difficult to get out of. At times, it may seem impossible to heal from a bad relationship, but know that with a little hard work and time, it can happen.

How-to Heal From a Bad Relationship: Recovering and Moving On

Grieve

First off, know that it is okay to be sad. Good relationship or bad relationship, you are still loosing something that was a part of you. Releasing those emotions will help you be able to start to heal from a bad relationship. Do not be ashamed to talk to someone about how you are feeling. Grieving is a healthy part of moving on to new, better things.

During this process, and likely later on too, you may start to question if you made the right decision. This is normal as well. Confront all of your doubt. Know that you ended the relationship for a reason. No matter what, do not reach back out to your ex, even though you may be tempted to. It will only cause you more pain, or even get you sucked back into the toxic relationship again. You deserve to be in a happy, healthy relationship.

Self Care

Do not beat yourself up for the choices you made or for getting into that relationship in the first place. Give yourself grace in order to heal from a bad relationship. Practice self-care and be kind to yourself. Know that this relationship does not define you. Spend time with friends and loved ones. This may mean having to reconnect with people that you have severed a relationship with, since unhealthy relationships can sometimes lead to broken bonds.

Remember the things you enjoyed before the relationship that you may have given up during the relationship. These could be great things to get back involved with. You may also decide to try something new. This could lead you to find something new and exciting that you enjoy, and take your mind off your bad relationship.

Improving Communication in a Marriage

Communication in a marriage is the absolute most important thing for a happy and long-lasting relationship. Communication isn’t just about talking to each other, though. It’s also about learning how to connect in other ways. One of the best ways to improve communication is to become a better listener. It’s also important to take time to talk when there are no distractions. Often, miscommunication happens because of simple logistics, so having a central place for information can be very helpful. And finally, learning your specific love language and your partners can be very helpful. Hopefully, you can learn to improve your communication and make your marriage stronger.

Improving Communication in a Marriage: The Secret Sauce for Success

Become a Better Listener

One of the best ways of improving communication in a marriage is to get better at listening. Listening doesn’t just mean being quiet while your partner talks. It also means thinking about what they’re saying. And showing that you understand. Nod, maintain eye contact and ask thoughtful questions to show you care. In return, your partner will likely listen more closely when you talk as well.

Be Distraction Free Sometimes

Improving communication in a marriage means being distraction-free sometimes. Life is busy. Between our phones and busy jobs, it can be hard to find time to talk without distractions. However, it is very important in a marriage. Try to set aside time each day where you put away your phones. Perhaps, try at mealtimes. If you have young children, take some time after they go to bed to connect about your day.

Have One Central Place for Information

A lot of times, miscommunication happens simply because people aren’t on the same page. Simple logistics can cause issues in a marriage just as easily as major problems. Improving communication in a marriage might just mean having one place to go for important information. For example, try a calendar app that your whole family can share. Having a central location for important information can help you stay on the same page with family events.

Learn Your Love Languages

Finally, one of the best ways of improving communication in a marriage is to learn each of your love languages. Each person has specific ways that they communicate with those they love. These can be through acts of service, words of affirmation, quality time, physical touch, and gift-giving. Learning which love language your partner speaks can help you connect more easily.

Improving communication in a marriage is one of the easiest ways to make it stronger. Communication is the basis of any relationship and is so important. Learning to listen better is a great way to start. Show your partner that you are interested in what they have to say. It’s also important to have some time to talk when you can focus without distractions. So put away your phones for a few minutes each day. This can let you truly connect. It can also help to have one place to go to for important family information. For example, a shared calendar app. And finally, learn your partner’s love language. By communicating with them in their love language, you can show how much you care. Hopefully, you can learn to communicate better and make your marriage even stronger.

How to Talk About Money with Your Spouse

It can be awkward to talk about money with your spouse, especially if you’ve been raised to never discuss finances with anybody. However, it’s a very important part of your lives together. Both you and your partner need to have a clear picture of your financial health. Start the conversation early in your marriage or even before you tie the knot. Be honest about debt and spending habits. Work together to figure out a financial goal. This could be a plan to get out of debt, a saving plan, or a retirement plan. And finally, keep the conversation going constantly throughout your lives. You should always be on the same page with finances with your spouse. Talking about money is a healthy part of any marriage that will make your relationship stronger.

How to Talk About Money with Your Spouse: Starting and Continuing the Conversation

Start Early

It’s important to talk about money with your spouse early on. It’s a great idea to discuss finances before you even get married. You should each have some idea of what kind of debt and income the other has so that you can plan accordingly. Once you start living together it’s important to be on the same page with spending and living habits.

Be Honest About Debt

Another important aspect of learning to talk about money with your spouse is to always be honest. It can be embarrassing to admit it if you have debt. However, your spouse needs to know the full picture. Be upfront about your spending habits. If you feel that you have problems with overspending, work together to come up with a solution. Hiding debt doesn’t make it go away.

Work Together

When you talk about money with your partner, you can work together to come up with financial goals. If you can, meet with a financial advisor who can help you create some realistic goals for your money. Come up with a plan to get out of debt, save for your future, save for emergencies, and a retirement plan. Don’t forget to save for things like vacations and home improvements, too.

Continue the Conversation

Finally, once you start to talk about money with your spouse, continue the conversation. You should both be checking in with each other about your financial health frequently. Both partners should have a clear idea of how on track you are with your goals. You don’t want to be surprised by unexpected financial problems. Keeping the lines of communication open will keep you both more on track with your spending habits.

You and your spouse need to talk about money throughout your marriage. After all, our lives depend on money entirely and you now have joint assets. You don’t want any financial issues to take you by surprise. Both of you should have a clear picture of your financial health throughout your marriage. Even if money is tight, this will allow you both to work together to start making things better. Start the conversation early and keep it going throughout your marriage. Be upfront and honest about spending habits and debt. And finally, work together to create some financial goals for your lives together. Whether you have plenty of money or are barely scraping by, tackling financial issues together will make your marriage stronger.

Make Valentine’s Day Memorable This Year

Valentine’s Day is a great time for a couple to reconnect and be reminded of how much they mean to each other. You and your partner might have been handling school closures with your children, travel stress from a pandemic, and both working from home together. It’s been a stressful time, so many couples need a little refresher on heating the romance. Start planning early for your Valentine’s Day surprise. Especially since restaurants are understaffed and have reduced hours. You might think of a special way to recreate an old memory or relive a fun time. Do something unexpected for your special someone that they’ll remember forever. And finally, be sincere and show them how much they mean to you. Keep that spark of romance going and remember why you love them so much in the first place.

Make Valentine’s Day Memorable This Year: How to Make the Holiday Extra Special for Your Sweetie

Plan Early

Remember to start planning Valentine’s Day early this year. There are plenty of restaurants that are facing shortages with staffing. In addition, many have reduced hours as well. Reservations are likely to fill up quickly and way in advance for fancier options. If you and your love are not comfortable going to a restaurant, consider ordering in from someplace special, or cooking dinner for them yourself.

Recreate an Old Memory

Another fun way to spark some romance this Valentine’s Day is to recreate an old memory. Pick a time early in your relationship that holds a lot of meaning for you. Take them back to that same spot and try to recreate an early date. Your partner will be touched by how thoughtful you are.

Do Something Unexpected

You can also keep the magic alive this Valentine’s Day by doing something unexpected. Try taking a cooking class and preparing them a new meal. Or you could take them dancing, to a drive-in movie, or on a romantic hike. You could also plan a short trip as a romantic get-away. Rather than the usual dinner or a movie, think of an off-the-wall date that is sure to be fun and memorable.

Make It Sincere

Finally, you don’t have to make it fancy to have a great Valentine’s Day. You just have to be sincere. You could organize a picnic in a pretty place, or even send them on a scavenger hunt with romantic clues. And it’s always a sweet thing to hand-write a note to your love about why you care about them as much as you do. If you get them a gift, try to find something that is unique, rather than a generic box of chocolates.

Making Valentine’s Day memorable is all about creativity and planning. Try to brainstorm about what it is about your partner that makes you love them so much. Then make sure that you convey that message to them on Valentine’s Day. It doesn’t have to be fancy or expensive, it just needs to be heartfelt. If you plan to take them out to eat at a nicer restaurant, plan to reserve your table soon as things will likely get booked far out this year. You could try recreating an old memory or doing something totally out of character. Surprise them with a unique date that they might never have thought of. And finally, don’t forget to be sincere and show them exactly how much you care. Hopefully, you and your love can have a magical Valentine’s Day that you’ll both remember forever.

Four Relationship Red Flags to Watch Out For

There are many relationship red flags to look out for when you start dating somebody. However, there are a few that are classic signs of emotional abuse. One of these is a lack of trust. If your partner needs to keep tabs on you all the time it can also be a warning sign. Another red flag is if they don’t have any other interests besides the relationship. And finally, if they are trying to put pressure on you to move faster than you feel comfortable, it’s a warning sign. If you notice any of these behaviors in your relationship, it might be time to examine them to see if it’s healthy.

Four Relationship Red Flags to Watch Out For (And Run From)

Lack of Trust

One of the main relationship red flags to look out for is a lack of trust. If your partner is always needing the details of where you’re going and who you are with, it shows a deep lack of trust. This is often a sign that they are insecure in the relationship. If they accuse you of cheating or being unfaithful when there is no reason, it also shows a lack of trust.

Controlling

One of the relationship red flags that are a clear indicator of emotional abuse is if your partner is controlling. This can present in many ways. Some partners want to keep tabs on where you go anytime you leave the house. Some go as far as installing trackers or going through your phone. Others use finances as a way to control and abuse their partners. If your partner is overly-controlling, it’s best to walk away before things escalate.

Lack of Interests

Another of the relationship red flags to be on the lookout for is if your partner doesn’t have interests outside of the relationship. For example, if they want to spend all of their time with you. Or if they don’t have a group of friends to hang out with outside of your relationship. While it’s fine to want to spend a lot of time with your partner it’s still important to maintain friendships and interests outside of the relationship.

Pressuring You

Finally, one final example of relationship red flags to look out for is if your partner is pressuring you. No caring partner should pressure you to move faster than you feel comfortable. If they are trying to put pressure on you to get intimate too quickly, have a frank conversation with them. Both partners must respect each others’ boundaries.

There are many relationship red flags to look for, but it’s especially important to look out for ones that can indicate early signs of emotional abuse. For example, if they don’t trust you and if you’ve never given them a reason to be mistrustful, it’s a warning sign. Similarly, if they keep tabs on you or try to control you, it can quickly get out of hand. In a healthy relationship, both partners should have interests and friendships outside of their dating lives. And finally, a loving and respectful partner will not pressure you to move faster than you feel comfortable. If you notice any of these red flags, it’s important to examine your relationship. Make sure that you are committing to somebody that respects you!

The Prenup Conversation: Avoiding Conflict

The prenup conversation is one that many couples struggle with. It can be awkward and uncomfortable because people often have strong opinions about the notion of a prenup. However, in many ways, a prenuptial agreement is very logical and protective. But your partner might see it as a red flag. Try to start the conversation early on in your engagement so that you don’t surprise them. Reassure them that it is just a precaution and that you are not going into the marriage with your eyes on divorce. And finally, remember that this is a discussion. Be respectful of their feelings and give them plenty of time to process and ask questions. Ultimately, you may or may not come to an agreement on prenups, but hopefully, you’ll be able to at least get the discussion off on the right foot.

The Prenup Conversation: Avoiding Conflict or Awkwardness

Why There Might Be Conflict

The prenup conversation is important because the divorce rate is very high these days. To pretend that marriage can’t end in divorce is naive. Realistically, if you or your spouse are coming into a marriage with significant assets or debts, a prenup is a good idea. It protects you if you ever do end up breaking up. In addition, it can save you a lot of hassle if you ever were to go down the divorce path because everything is decided at the outset. However, many feel that talking prenups is a signal that you already are planning your divorce. Or even believe that it’s bad luck to discuss one.

Start the Conversation Early

It’s best to start the prenup conversation early in your engagement. You don’t want to spring this on a partner at the last second. And in fact, it can take a while to settle the prenup agreement so you might not even have time if you decide on one last minute. Begin the conversation early and revisit it if things don’t go as you planned originally.

Be Reassuring

If you know the prenup conversation is going to bring up strong emotions from your partner, try to be reassuring. Let them know that you are only doing it as a precaution. Many people think that prenups are only for couples who aren’t truly committed to each other. Let them know that this is not the case. Instead, it’s a way of protecting your future.

It’s a Discussion

Finally, if the prenup conversation doesn’t go as well as you hoped, remember that it’s a discussion. Listen to your partner’s concerns and feelings. Give them plenty of space to think over what you said and to ask you questions. It might need to be an ongoing conversation for a while to make them comfortable. Be respectful of their feelings even if they disagree with you.

The prenup conversation is an important thing for couples to discuss in many situations. If either of you is bringing a lot of assets or debt into the marriage, or have children from a previous marriage, it’s very important. Similarly, if either of you runs your own business, or if you’ve previously been married, it’s good to have the conversation. Approach the conversation early on so that it’s not a last-minute surprise to your partner. They may need time to process what you’ve said and make a decision. However, be respectful of their feelings either way and understand that some people have very strong feelings about prenups. Hopefully, you can agree on something that works for both of you and then never think of it again!

Post-Divorce Revenge Body: Is it Healthy?

The post-divorce revenge body has come into popular media thanks to some celebrity breakups. A “revenge body” occurs when somebody who has recently gone through a breakup decides to get in top shape. The goal is to make your ex sorry that they ever let you go. But is it healthy? And if you’re set on getting one, how do you go about it? The key lies in deciding the motivation and approaching it healthily. You’ll need to focus on exercise and eating right to get in your healthier shape. And finally, sleep is a huge component of making your body as healthy as possible. Whether you decide to get a “revenge body” or not, getting your body in healthier shape is almost always a good thing.

Post-Divorce Revenge Body: Is it Healthy? How to Get One?

Is it a Good Idea

A post-divorce revenge body might sound like a promising idea. The notion of your ex slobbering over you after seeing how in shape you are might have you more determined than ever to work out. However, if the whole idea of getting in shape revolves around sending a signal to your ex, it’s a clear sign that you might not have moved on from the relationship. If your entire goal is to ultimately hurt your ex, then maybe you should try to re-think your motivation. If you are just wanting a fresh start and a new outlook on life after a breakup, then getting in your best health is a great idea! It can really boost confidence and help you get back out there in the dating world.

Exercise

Whether or not you decide on a revenge body, if you’re trying to get in better shape, exercise is a great place to start. However, exercising without knowing how can lead to serious injury. If it’s been a while since you’ve worked out, speak to a doctor to make sure that they clear you for it. After that, head to a gym, watch an online tutorial or hire a personal trainer to teach you how to exercise. They should show you proper form and give you examples of what exercises to do. It’s healthiest to do a combination of cardio and strength-building workouts.

Eating Healthy

Another major component of getting into your healthiest body or revenge body is eating well. You can exercise for hours every day, but without a clean diet, you won’t get very far. It’s important to get variety in your diet and to eat in moderation. A good rule of thumb is to follow the healthy plate rule. Fill up half your plate with fruits and veggies, 30% with protein, and 20% with grains. Try to aim for fresh fruit and veggies and lean proteins like chicken or fish. For grains, try to incorporate whole grains like wheat bread and brown rice.

Getting Enough Sleep

One final component to getting your healthiest body, or your revenge body, is to get enough sleep. Sleep helps your entire body to function more efficiently. Studies show that getting poor sleep leads to more weight gain and poorer decisions. In contrast, getting plenty of sleep can help you stay concentrated on your goals of getting healthy. Aim for 7-9 hours of sleep a night.

A revenge body may not be the healthiest way to approach getting in shape. However, if you’ve gone through a breakup, getting into your healthiest body might be just the ticket to gaining confidence. You’ll feel a sense of confidence just from setting goals and reaching them, not to mention the physical benefits of getting plenty of exercises, sleep, and eating well. Try to keep the focus on becoming the best version of yourself for yourself, and not for anybody else. You’re investing in your own future and well-being and your body will thank you for it later!

Dating After a Divorce: Am I Ready?

How do you know when you’re ready for dating after a divorce? It can be hard to even imagine yourself getting back into the dating game. But if you’ve healed from the pain of your break-up and have taken time to soul-search, you might be ready. Take things at your own pace and don’t let anybody pressure you. Make sure that your divorce is completely final before beginning to date, and take time to heal from the stress of that. Date yourself first and give yourself some time to figure out who you are post-divorce. And make sure that when the time comes, you take things at your own pace. Hopefully, you’ll find the confidence to get back into the dating game and find a partner that is perfect for you.

Dating After a Divorce: Am I Ready to Get Back Into This?

Make Sure Divorce is Final

The first advice for dating after a divorce is to wait until the divorce is finalized. The divorce process can take many months and sometimes even longer. But it’s really a good idea to wait until it’s completely done before getting back into the dating pool. Potential dates might feel uncomfortable dating somebody who is still technically in a marriage. And your dating life could end up having an effect on your divorce settlement. It’s safest just to hold off until things are all settled.

Take Time to Heal

Take plenty of time to heal before dating after a divorce. Divorce is incredibly stressful. In fact, many people compare it to the stress of losing a loved one. Divorce can create a lot of hurts and a lot of emotional scars that can take time to heal. Make sure that you’ve taken some time to heal from the stress of the whole process.

Date Yourself First

Another thing to do before dating after a divorce is to date yourself! Take some time to give yourself a break and a little self-love. Find a hobby or activity that makes you feel good about yourself. Go on a mini-vacation or take some me-time to relax. Your marriage was a huge part of who you were for years, so you might find that you’re a different person after the marriage is over. Take some time to figure out who you are post-divorce. Learn to love your new identity.

Go Your Own Pace

Finally, when getting back into dating after a divorce, go at your own pace. Don’t let anybody pressure you into dating before you feel like you’re ready. Everybody heals at their own pace. Take as much time as you need to get yourself mentally prepared for dating and opening yourself up to another person again. If you do start dating, take the relationship slowly. There’s no need to rush, and going slow can help you really get to know the other person and figure out if they’re a good match.

Dating after a divorce can feel overwhelming at times. Give yourself plenty of time and space to get ready to take the plunge into the dating pool. Make sure that your divorce is final before getting involved with a new partner. Take plenty of time to emotionally heal from your divorce, and to get to know who you are post-divorce. And remember to take things at your own pace. You can take as long as you need to. It’s best to take things slow so that you can really invest your time in a person who is a great match for you. Hopefully, you’ll find somebody that you can build a future.

How to Confront Your Partner About Cheating

If you want to confront your partner about cheating, it’s best to wait until you have proof. If you confront them with just a vague idea that they’re cheating, they may not be inclined to tell you the honest truth. Remember that if they’re cheating in the first place, then honesty is not their priority. But if you know for sure that they are being unfaithful, pick the best time and place to have a conversation. Figure out what you want to get out of the conversation before it even starts. Listen to what they have to say and actually take in what they’re telling you. And finally, schedule a time for a follow-up discussion after you’ve had some time to process. Infidelity in a relationship can be very painful, but sometimes there is a way to salvage the relationship.

How to Confront Your Partner About Cheating: The Tough Conversation

Pick the Right Time and Place

If you plan to confront your partner about cheating, pick the right time and place. This means choosing a time where you won’t be interrupted. In addition, make sure that you’re somewhere private. Don’t try to spring this type of conversation on them while they’re rushing out the door to work. Or in a crowded restaurant where you might be overheard. Find a time and place where you feel calm and rational and open to actually hearing them out.

Figure Out What You Want to Get Out of the Conversation

Next, if you plan to confront your partner about cheating, decide what you want the outcome to be. Are you wanting to figure out a way to work things out? Or do you plan to end the relationship if they confirm the cheating? If you are wanting to work things out, approach the conversation with an open mind. Figure out what steps you need to take to make a relationship work after this. If you plan to break up, will they move out? When? Also, decide upfront whether you want to hear details about the cheating or just keep things vague.

Listen to What They Have to Say

If you plan to confront your partner about cheating, try to actually listen to what they have to say. They may have reasons for cheating that you hadn’t considered. Maybe there are things in your relationship that can be improved. If this is the case, perhaps there’s a chance to work on it and move on. Don’t let them try to convince you that their cheating was your fault though. Cheating is a choice that they made, not a mistake that happened to them. But it might make you feel better to know the actual reasons if there are any.

Plan a Follow-Up

If you plan to confront your partner about cheating but want to work things out, plan a follow-up. Don’t try to take in everything on the day they tell you about it. Give yourself plenty of time to think over everything they’ve said. Figure out how you feel about everything. You’ll need time to process the feelings of grief, embarrassment, betrayal, hurt, and anger. Figure out what you want your relationship to look like moving forward, and then have another conversation with them to see if they’re on board. You’ll also need to decide whether you’ll be able to trust them again.

Cheating can be incredibly painful and difficult to process. But sometimes, couples are able to move forward afterward and continue their relationship. If you plan to confront your partner about cheating, it’s best to wait until you have proof. Otherwise, they may just deny it and you won’t get very far. Plan to have the conversation when you have plenty of time and are someplace private. Figure out what you want to get out of the conversation beforehand, and decide what level of detail you even want to know. Try to really listen to what they have to say. And finally, give yourself some time to process everything and then plan a follow-up conversation. It’s possible to move on and have a healthy relationship after cheating. However, it has to be something that you both want and are willing to work towards together.