Different Types of Adoption: Pros and Cons

Deciding to adopt a child is a huge decision, but a very exciting one! But the different types of adoption options can be overwhelming. You can choose to have an open adoption or closed adoption. There is also the option of semi-open adoption. Each has benefits and drawbacks. These will help you determine which is the best fit for your family.

Different Types of Adoption: Benefits and Drawbacks

Open Adoption

Open adoption is one of the types of adoption you can choose from. This form of adoption means that you and the birth parents will be in contact. For example, everybody knows everybody else’s identities. The amount of contact between parents can vary based on what everybody wants. However, one of the drawbacks is that there can be boundary issues. Therefore, it’s best to establish clear ideas about your future relationship at the start. One positive of open adoption is that your child can know both sets of parents. Also, you’ll be able to find out more about your child’s medical history.

Closed Adoption

Another type of adoption you can choose is a closed adoption. You and the birth parents will not have any contact at all. You’ll only find out information about the birth parents that is non-identifying. In addition, all your contact will be through a third-party mediator. One of the pros of this is that you won’t have to worry about anybody interfering with your parenting. Another positive is that if the child is from an abusive or dangerous situation, you will never have to worry about them having contact. However, you won’t know much about the child’s medical history, and the decision is permanent.

Semi-Open Adoption

One final option is a semi-open adoption. Of the types of adoptions, this is a little bit of a mix of all. In a semi-open adoption, you can have limited contact with birth parents. This would be through a third-party attorney or mediator. You can exchange mail or photos but you probably won’t know each other’s full identities. Or addresses. A positive of this is that you’ll have more access to your child’s medical history. But a negative is that it can be difficult to move on for the birth parents. Your child can also have some confusion about everybody’s roles.

The three types of adoption each have pros and cons. You can choose an open adoption, closed adoption, or semi-open. Whichever option you choose, you’ll want to discuss first with your attorney. You’re making a huge decision for your family. Whichever you choose needs to feel right for you.

Healthy Eating Post-Divorce

It’s important to make sure you keep healthy after your divorce ends. One way you can do this is by practicing some healthy eating post-divorce. Still, it isn’t always easy. That’s why it’s good to know some helpful ways to stick to your eating goals…

Healthy Eating Post-Divorce: Adjust Your Diet

Picking a diet

Most people try to look for a diet when they want to do some healthy eating post-divorce. However, it’s important that you find one which fits your needs. Different diets can help with different things. For instance, one diet may help with weight loss, whereas another may be good if you want to add some muscle.

Also, be wary of any “fad” diets. Many times, these wont’ give you the results you expect. They could also be unhealthy in general! Therefore, just be sure you always do a good amount of research into whatever diets you’re looking at.

When you’re undereating

It isn’t uncommon for recently divorced people to lack an appetite. This can cause them to not eat as much as they should. Not only can this lead to a loss of energy, it can even make you rapidly lose an unhealthy amount of weight.

While it can be hard to find the motivation to do healthy eating post-divorce, you still need to make sure you get those important nutrients. You could try to make things such as protein shakes or smoothies. These will be both easier to make and eat than other meals. The same goes for soups and salads. Once you get back on track, you’ll find that your appetite will probably soon come back!

When you’re overeating

Binge eating is also pretty common after a divorce. In order to deal with the stress and anxiety, many people turn to comfort foods. While they’ll feel better when eating, most of these foods tend to be unhealthy. As a result, you may find yourself gaining weight in the process.

The best way to stick to healthy eating post-divorce is to get rid of the temptation. Clear out all of that unhealthy food from your house. Then, stick to good, healthy foods, especially those which can be filling in smaller amounts. Soon, you’ll find that your eating habits will get back to more-healthy levels.

How-to Manage a School Year Divorce

Getting a divorce at any time can be quite rough. However, pulling off a school year divorce can be especially tough. Therefore, it’s useful to know what you can do to help make the process easier for everyone in your family…

How-to Manage a School Year Divorce: Reducing Stress

Talk to your kids

When you begin a school year divorce, it’s important you talk to your kids. Divorce can shake them up quite a bit. Having to juggle new school demands alongside that can make things even more rough. This year, there’s also the unique challenges that Covid-19 might present too.

That’s why talking to your kids will be helpful. Here, you can get to better explain what’s going on and reiterate that you’ll support them no matter what. You should also let them know that they can come to you and talk about anything that’s bothering them, school-related or not. That way, they don’t feel like they need to keep their feelings bottled up.

Set up a good routine

A good routine is especially important for your kids when you’re doing a school year divorce. A consistent schedule will help provide some much-needed stability for them. At the same time, it also allows for you to have something to schedule your divorce matters around. This can help ensure that the divorce proceedings won’t interfere too much with your kid’s school schedule.

Don’t forget to include their other parent in this schedule as well. After all, it’s important that they get to see them and spend some time with them. Some parents like to set up having alternating days. One parent will pick the kids up, take them home, and drop them off next morning. Then, the other parent will do the same, helping to keep the time equal.

Reach out to their teachers

Even with your help, a school year divorce can inadvertently impact how your kids do in school. Sometimes, it may be hard for them to focus as they think about the divorce. Other times, they may just lose their motivation to finish any assignments. A good way to get ahead of this is by reaching out to their teachers.

By letting their teachers know what’s going on at home, they can better help your kids in the classroom. After all, their teachers want to help the succeed too. You don’t have to go into a lot of details about your divorce either. Just mentioning it can be enough for their teachers to understand and better work with your kids.

How-to Decide How to Spend the Holidays Mid-Divorce

Making holiday plans can be really tricky and stressful. Then throw a divorce in the mix, and the decisions get far more complicated. Do you celebrate the holidays together as a family, or do you spend them separately and start your own new traditions? This is an especially difficult decision when kids are in the picture. Every situation and family dynamics will be different, so there is no cookie cutter answer. However, by thinking through these tips, you will be able to decide how to spend the holidays mid-divorce.

How-to Decide How to Spend the Holidays Mid-Divorce: Together or Apart

Together

Sharing the holidays as an entire family is ideal. Keeping the same routine and traditions could make these transitions a bit easier. However, that is not possible for many parents during a divorce. Deciding if you should spend the holidays together as a family while going through a divorce really comes down to several factors. Tensions can really flare up from built-up frustrations and the stress of the holidays mid-divorce. Honestly ask yourself if you are you able to get along with your spouse in a civil manner. You do not want there to be an explosion of anger and hurt to ruin the holiday celebrations. This is especially not fair for your kids, who will already be struggling with the divorce. If you feel like this may be a problem, consider talking to a councilor or spending the holidays separately.

Split

When deciding how to spend the holidays mid-divorce, some families may opt for a split set up. This may work best if one or both parents have a new significant other. Other reasons could be that tensions are high between parents, or they do not live nearby one another. While things will feel different than before, you will be able to create your own new holiday traditions. However, don’t forget to consider what is best for your kids too.

With this arrangement, one parent may get the kids during one part of the day to celebrate, and then swap later in the day. This could also be done on as an alternation between who gets Christmas Eve and who gets Christmas Day every year. Sometimes parents live far apart and it is not possible to easily switch within a day during the holidays. In these situations, it is possible to do alternating years for which parents get the kids during the holidays. The set up you make during the divorce could even continue after the divorce is finalized if the situation worked for you.